Category Archives: Mindset

Women in cyber security: Five hard lessons I learnt in 2016 & why I’m grateful

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Five hard lessons I learnt in 2016 & why i'm grateful

It's England. It's cold, the night is drawing in, and it's the last day of 2016. It's been a while since I published a blog here, as I've spent all year writing my book. It's totally consumed me, but as it's nearly finished, I'm sitting at my desk, reflecting on the year and thinking about you. I'm astounded at what I've achieved, how much I've grown, how many amazing people I've spoken to or met, and how quickly the year has gone by. I'd like to share some of this with you, as I'm grateful for your support, and feel I owe you so much.

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Mercedes Maidana on manifesting your dreams

By | business start ups, Established business, Lifestyle, Mindset | No Comments

An interview with Mercedes Maidana

Mercedes Maidana Interview With Jane FranklandMercedes Maidana is a force to be reckoned with. If you've never heard of her, let me explain. Mercedes Maidana helps people live their dreams and an abundant life. By abundant, she means: happy, joyful, passionate and fulfilled. You see she believes (and can prove) that once you fill yourself from the inside out, all areas of your life will be aligned into more abundance.

Without giving too much away, her story can be told as follows…

Raised as a city girl in Buenos Aires, Argentina, she travelled to Brazil after having her heart broken by the man she loved. There she discovered surfing and a new passion arose.

At age 26, five years after having started surfing, she decided she wanted to go for her next big dream: to become one of the best female big wave surfers in the world and to get paid to travel by chasing huge waves. And yes, you guessed it, she pulled it off….and more!

Mercedes Maidana uses all the manifesting techniques that she's learned throughout the years, and today she's living her dream!

Here are some of her achievements through manifestations:

  • Sponsorship with the kick ass clothing company Patagonia.
  • Travels the world surfing big and small waves, whenever she wants, wherever she wants.
  • Six years after she started surfing she was nominated at the XXL Big Wave Awards as one of the three best women big wave surfers in the world.
  • Nominated again in 2010 and 2011. If you know anything about big wave surfing you'll know this is extraordinary!
  • Lives in her dream home on the beach in what she considers the best place in the world: the North Shore of Oahu.

In the interview Mercedes Maidana answers these five questions:

1. How did it all start?
2. How do you distinguish fear from intuition?
3. How do you bring joy into your business?
4. What tips can you give us on abundance?
5. What are Hell Yeahs & how did they come about?

Watch the video now

If you're interested in:

  • Making lots of money
  • Finding true love and obtaining loving relationships
  • Having your health aligned with your self worth
  • Having a career that's joyful and creative
  • Having solid spiritual foundations to live on

..then you need to seek Mercedes out! To work with Mercedes Maidana, please visit her website and mention you came through me.

Now I want to hear from you…

Tell me if you've used manifestations as recommended by Mercedes Maidana to attract abundance and realise your dreams. If so, what's your biggest tip and how has your life transformed? Share your stories and experience here and if you've got a question, just pop it down here.

Thanks for participating!

With love and gratitude – as always,

P.S.

Finally, if you know someone who'd LOVE the insight from this Mercedes Maidana post, please send them a link. You’ll find solo entrepreneurs, consultants and yes, even sales and marketing managers who manage people who'll be interested to hear about this.

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P.P. S.

If you want to learn more about how to get more client, sell without selling plus more time management tips, then my brand new program, TheDailyWins is closing at midnight 3 November. Get on the list if you want in on the action.

Time management tips [this tip rules them all]

By | Established business, Mindset, New business | No Comments

The mother of all time management tips

Time Management Tips by Jane FranklandGot time? Bah! No one has enough of it. Right?

We're all too busy.

So when it comes to getting productive with our days, and getting stuff done (let alone epic shit done) we all struggle.

And, whilst there are a million time management tips for you to access over the Internet, plus a tonne of time management books to read, and course after course, and system after system for you to join and implement, there's really only one time management tip that you need to pay attention to.  And, this one simply rules them all.

Now I learnt this tip from my daughter and that's why in today's Jane Frankland TV you're going to learn the ‘mother of all time management tips'  from her. She's only 11 years old but is extremely wise.  As she gave it to me,  she begged me to allow her to do this for you! 😉

Video break

So doing one thing at a time is a good rule to adopt if you want to get more done in your day AND be happier. Now I know from experience that women struggle with this more than men do and I'm not going to get into a debate about that in this week's post. However, I'm going to give you some research to prove the effectiveness of applying it (for both men and women)!

To elaborate, research conducted by Dr Glenn Wilson, a psychiatrist at King’s College London University monitored the impact of multitasking on workers’ performances. The results showed that when test participants were interrupted by lots of emails and phone calls whilst trying to work on other things, their IQ dropped by 10 points. Alarmingly, this equals the effect of missing a whole night’s sleep and more than doubles that of smoking marijuana!

OMG!

If you're interested you can read more about it here, and whether women are better at multi-tasking than men.

Anyway, if you're struggling to get things done, remember this mother of all time management tips. If you want, you can do as I do and remind yourself of it every day. I have it as a voice memo on my iPhone and I find by listening to it once a day it keeps me focused.

[box]”Work while you work, and play while you play. That is the way to be happy each day” – Jane Frankland TWEET THIS[/box]

Here's the full poem:

“Work while you work; play while you play. That is the way to be cheerful all day.

All that you do, do with your might. Things done by halves are never done right.

One thing each time and that done well, is a very good rule as many can tell.

Moments are useless trifled away; so work while you work and play while you play.” ~M.A. Stodart

Now I want to hear from you…

Tell me your time management tips. Which one is your favourite?  Share your stories and experience here and if you've got a question, just pop it down here.

Thanks for participating!

With love and gratitude – as always,

P.S.

Finally, if you know someone who'd LOVE the insight from this post, please send them a link. You’ll find solo entrepreneurs, consultants and yes, even sales and marketing managers who manage people who'll be interested to hear about this.

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P.P. S.

If you want to learn more about how to get more client, sell without selling plus more time management tips,  then my brand new program, The Daily Wins is launching this month, 18th October. Get on the list if you want in on the action.

 

Social media addiction: ready for a detox?

By | Marketing, Mindset, Sales | One Comment

Social media is the answer

Social Media Addiction by Jane FranklandSocial media addiction and detoxing. I hope you're ready!

I'm going to start at the beginning and this means dealing with the statement ‘social media is the answer.'

Poppycock!

It's time to bust this myth wide open.

Social media is not the answer. [I bet you're thinking the answer to what.]

Social media is not the answer to growing your business. What's more … it's actually a threat to it. Why do I say this?

Well before I go into this, I want to ask you something. Do you refresh Facebook 10-15 times an hour to track likes, messages and general interaction? Do you check Twitter and do the same? I'm expecting a yes. Some of you may even go further and check YouTube, Pinterest Instagram and Linkedin! Some of you may even be having more interaction with fans and followers online than with those immediately around you.

Hands up if that's you?

I know I've been guilty of doing this. Yes, I'm fessing up!

Now I bet you've been told that social media is essential for your business. Well there's truth to this but only if it's used strategically. This is not my bug bear. This is what is….social media addiction!

Social media addiction

In some way or another many of you (including me) have become slightly obsessed with social media and the interaction and engagement it demands. Unlike email it's a tool that expects a very instant response. If you've implemented the advice of the “experts” that's what you'll have been taught along the way.

However, it's wrong.

What's happened is that many of you have become dependent on it, and habits (including bad habits) have formed. While it may seem like an innocent and essential tool to market your business, unintentionally it's reinforcing some deep rooted fears. You see there's a dark side to social media. Used incorrectly it nurtures insecurity – feelings of being liked and good enough.

Think about it. The more likes and interaction you get, the better you feel. Right?

Yes, and stroke that ego whilst you're at it!

Social media as a threat to your business

So what happens when you don't get the Likes, ReTweets or interaction? What happens when you're not feeling the social love? For most of you you'll genuinely feel unloved, unheard and rejected. Some of you may become depressed. Then you'll pick yourself up and work harder to obtain the “love” through subsequent posts, Tweets and so on.

And this is where the threat actually lies.

It's the feeling of inadequacy it brings up. And the feeling of dependency. A co dependent relationship with a tool – nice!

But there's more….

A recent study by Harvard University on social media addiction shows evidence as to why social media platforms such as Facebook and Twitter are so popular and highly addictive for many people. The study aimed to dig into the psyche of why people are eager to self disclose i.e. post their thoughts and actions on social media.

Through a series of experiments, the study revealed that the act of disclosing personal or opinionated information activates the same part of the brain that's associated with the sensation of pleasure – the same pleasure that you get from eating food, getting money or even having sex!

Oh la la!

Story time…

Ok so where's this all going. Well here's my story to illustrate the point I'm making. As you know by now, I too have struggled with the social media “love” loop. In all honesty I didn't actually realise I had a problem with it until the other day.

I became aware when I decided to get super focused and complete an online course. I knew it was time to get this course to you. 18 years worth of complex sales experience coupled with growing a 7-figure business had to be turned into IP and transferred into course format if I was going to help you.

I could also hear my mentor's words ringing in my head, “Jane if you don't have a product, then you don't have a business.”

Anyway, to do this meant hours of work and I knew that the only way I could achieve this was through mega discipline. I knew I had to switch off my social media networks for the bulk of the day. I had to get targeted and even more strategic with it.

I had to go on a social media detox!

I was a little scared. That sounds silly but I'm being honest.

I knew social media was the most powerful way to get exposure, increase my leads and deliver my message to the world. I'd worked hard on it and was seeing results. What if my likes, fans and followers didn't grow as much? What if my engagement levels fell? My business would surely suffer and all the hard work I'd done would be to no avail.

Well surprisingly none of this happened! My social media likes, re-tweets, fans and followers kept on growing. And what's more, I felt a lot better.

Result!

What's the alternative to social media?

There's no alternative to social media if you want to grow your business. You need to do it. However, you need to protect yourself and reduce your risk exposure to the threat of social media addiction. When it comes to entrepreneurship, mindset and mental health is so important.

So the only way you're going to crack this is not through avoidance, but by having a social media strategy devised and implemented. You need to know how it fits in to your overall marketing and sales plan and therefore what you want to achieve from it from the get-go. You need to be able to measure results. You need a schedule in place for posting, tweeting and interacting. And as if that's not enough, you're going to have to be disciplined. Super discipline in fact. You need to decide how much time you're going to spend on it. 30 minutes each day should do the trick.

Now I want to hear from you…

Tell me your story. Have you gone on a social media detox at any point in your business? If you did, what results did you see? Are you concerned about social media addiction or the feelings it brings up when you're on it? Share your stories and experience here.

Thanks for participating!

With love and gratitude – as always,

P.S.

Finally, if you know someone who'd LOVE the insight from this post, please send them a link. You’ll find solo entrepreneurs, consultants and yes, even sales and marketing managers who manage people who'll be interested to hear about this.

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Don’t lose out! Seven core habits to create wealth in business

By | Established business, Mindset, New business | No Comments

How to create wealth longterm

Create Wealth with Jane Frankland Seven Habits for Longterm Financial WealthLast week I wrote about how to create wealth, attract money and be a money magnet. I referenced money affirmations and mindset mainly. This week's post is more practical. It's more strategic too. I'm getting specific and as a result you'll be getting the 7 core habits I've been using forever-and-a-day to grow large, profitable businesses, including my own!

You lucky, lucky things! 😉

My 7-core habit create wealth formula

Habit #1. Learn about money and success from wealthy people. Yes it's really quite simple. Go and make friends with the bling-bling crowd. Hang out with them. Watch how they operate. Listen to the way they deal with things.

If you've not read Rich Dad Poor Dad give it a skim. It illustrates the point I'm making well. You see, the truth of the matter is this – most of us learn about money from our parents. No one teaches us about money and success in school and it's a big failing in my opinion.

So, consider who you've been taking money advice from. Is it from your friends and family who've struggled to make ends meet, or is it from successful mentors who've proven they know how to make and maintain money and wealth?

Now I've hung out with a lot of wealthy people over the years and I can tell you this – wealthy people regularly take advice from people who've more money than they have. They employ the smartest accountants who make their money work for them i.e. they make it go further. They also continue learning about money and about investing all the time.

So take time to learn from those who know. Let their knowledge rub off on you.

Habit #2. Take good care of your money and become a good money manager. I used to dread logging into my bank account online or going to the ATM and requesting a balance. I used to have to psych myself up each time. No joke! It's ridiculous I know, but it's true. However, it dawned on me slowly. How could I hope to get more money if I couldn't deal with these basics? So if this is resonating with you, do as I did: start to treat your money like it's of real value. Doh! And, the easiest way to do this is to imagine it is!

Watch your bank account too. Look at the interest you're being charged and manage your cashflow daily. You need to have your eye on your P&L (profit and loss) and review it regularly. Management accounting is about as sexy as selling. Sorry. It's a pretty dry subject but it's so important.

So, you need to know exactly how much money you've got coming in (both for your business and for your personal accounts) and how much money is going out. You don't need to be a whizz at maths to do this either. You can do this with a simple spreadsheet but if you've got accounting software then that's even better. Look at your cashflow, sales order book and invoicing DAILY. It will focus your mind! Cash is always king.

Story time…

I learnt the “cash is king' lesson the hard way when my first 7-figure business nearly failed. Picture the scene. I'd just had my third child (the other two were 10 years and 19 months) and the business was set to storm the year. My business partner and I had adopted an even more intense ‘all or nothing' growth attitude. We'd decided at the start of the year to stop playing it safe and to take some measured risks so we could grow. For example, risk #1 was investing in one of our industry's largest shows as an exhibitor. Risk #2 was taking on a very expensive consultant in preparation for a contract that we'd just been given a verbal order on. Risk #3 was signing off on larger office premises. Now we had a strong order book at the time, but when several of our clients went into receivership out of the blue, owing us money, it nearly wiped out our business. Having a strong order book was about as useful as a chocolate fire guard. The bank wasn't able to extend any credit or able to increase our overdraft. Unless we could find a way to pay our suppliers, we were out of business too. However, we fought hard to hang on to the business, and thankfully we managed to turn it around. The lesson was learnt!

Video break

Ok back to the habits….

I'm going to bring up debts whilst we're on the subject of money management. Make sure to pay your debts on time but also use debt to grow your business. What do I mean when I say this? Well, as an entrepreneur you're going to have to use debt occasionally to grow your business. I call this ‘good debt' as it leads to you making more money. It's an investment. It delivers a return (ROI) and it generates cash! Examples of good debt include investing in a course, some coaching, equipment and so on. It may be through a credit card, a lease or hire purchase. Bad debt on the other hand is when you put things on credit cards and it doesn't generate you any money. I'd use a company car as an example.

One of the best books I've read on money management and how to create wealth is The Richest Man in Babylon.The book dispenses financial advice through a collection of parables set in ancient Babylon. It teaches you through the characters in the parables who learn simple lessons in financial wisdom. Interestingly, it was first produced as a series of separate informational pamphlets and was distributed by banks and insurance companies.. It's a classic and an enjoyable quick read.

Habit #3. Look for opportunities and avoid being comfortable at all times. As an entrepreneur you've got to do things that others won't do. You've got to think, be, and act differently. And if you're after success you need to see opportunities where other people just see risk. I'm going to use companies that started in recessions as examples – Disney, IBM, Apple, Microsoft, General Motors, General Electric, Burger King, FedEx, Revlon, CNN, and in the UK, our very own M&S!

Habit #4. Play to win and make sure you're playing to win BIG. Decide now. How much money do you want to make? This is the time when you really can pluck a number from the air. However, once you've done this you need to plan for it and test it out. This means you've got to work out intelligently and strategically how you're going to achieve it. NEVER settle for an ambiguous amount without doing this. Otherwise that would be plain dumb!

Habit #5. Get used to being uncomfortable and decide if you're playing to win or loose. Avoid thinking and using the word ‘comfortable' at all times. Being comfortable will keep you stuck in survival mode. In order to get out of your current money zone you've got to get out of your comfort zone. Your business is only ever going to grow as much as you do and you're only growing when you're uncomfortable. Ironically when you're used to discomfort you're going to end up with wealth and success that makes you very comfortable.

[box]”Small thinking and small actions lead to small bank accounts. Big thinking and big actions lead to big money” – Jane Frankland TWEET THIS[/box]

Habit #6. Learn to love receiving. This can be so hard for many of you I know. It was for me, until fairly recently. I cured it by becoming aware of it and learning to respond in a different manner. For example, whenever someone used to say that they liked my outfit I'd be quite embarrassed and say something like, “oh this? I've had it ages.” Now,  I just smile and thank them. It's a win-win for both of us. When you don't accept a gift you're actually denying someone else the joy of giving. So if you're guilty of doing this, work on it as soon as you can.

Getting this sorted can go a long way to sorting out those “I'm not charging enough” or “Am I worth it” money issues I blogged about the other week. It enables you to feel comfortable charging appropriately for your products and services. Make sure to always charge well for your services and don't apologise for your rates or success. Get paid on time or ahead of time. Become good at asking for and receiving payment because you're worth it.

Habit #7. Enjoy giving.This is often referred to as ‘playing it forward' and I love it. There is nothing more satisfying than being able to do it and it's one of the reasons so many entrepreneurs are in business. You want to give to the charities and causes you believe in as you've a social conscience. So donate or give a percentage to charity and remember to leave a tip after a meal or for the maid if you've stayed at a hotel.

Now I want to hear from you…

Tell me which of these tips will you use? What tips do you use to create wealth and manage your money. Please share them here.

Thanks for participating!

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

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The secret to creating wealth and how to be a money magnet

By | Mindset | No Comments

Creating wealth: show me the money!

Creating wealth and how to attract money with Jane Frankland Creating wealth and attracting the money. Yes or No? Well, here's the thing. No matter how hard you try to deny it, money has a very important place in the world. Comments like ‘money won't make you happy,' ‘money is the route of all evil', bla bla bla are a load of toss! We all need money. It makes life easier, more comfortable and you can do great things with it.

Buying great shoes is one of the first things that comes to mind. Jimmy Choo, Salvatore Ferragamo….ahhhh  😉

No seriously…

You're a socially conscious entrepreneur, who's driven to make a difference in the world, so with money you can give back to the causes you believe in and help others.

Now when it comes to money, I tend to think of it a bit like WD-40, the lubricant. Yes I can be a geeza gal at times. It's hard to believe I know, especially when I get on to the subject of shoes! Anyway, money makes life a lot smoother!

However, here's the NOTE TO SELF.

How you think and feel about money and success is actually more important than how you achieve the two. The reason I say this is because I can teach you all the tips and tricks in the world on how to make money; how to grow your business using business development tips and strategies. However, if you don't adjust your mindset so that you're thinking and feeling the success and wealth that you're trying to achieve, then you're on a fast train to nowhere. This is why I always teach my students in my coaching programmes to expect success and to plan for it.

I know what I'm saying is resonating with you as so many of you have approached me about it recently. Questions like ‘How do I know what to charge,' ‘Am I charging too low' and then seeing you at seminar after seminar and webinar after webinar are classic tell-tell signs. You also join everyone's programmes and you're not moving forward. Yes?

Now the reason I'm banging on about this is because I've gone through this process myself. So I'll cut you some slack here as I'm no smarty pants. Granted it could be on account of a block or procrastination, which is ok. I wrote recently about procrastination – increase productivity vs life gets in the way and other excuses, which is relevant for creating wealth. I talked about how it could actually be quite a positive thing if identified and acted upon. However, chances are this is not the case. Rather it's because you need to fix your mindset. You need to get your money story right.

In my experience there are several ways to solve this. You can either do money mantras and money affirmations or you can simply step into your true identity. The choice is yours. Both will work as it all boils down to what you believe, but one will actually work faster.

So let's start off with the fastest route. Speed is good!

Stepping in to your true identity

Ready for the tough love? Ok. You alone are responsible for your own financial success and no one else. If you blame other people for your financial circumstances you'll be stuck where you are forever. You are where you are because of you!

Now, the good news is that you've got everything within you to change things right now. You just have to be willing to do this. All you need to do is to step into this identity. Think of it a bit like putting on clothes. You just pick what you want to wear, pop it on and off you go. You've now got complete permission and the power to do this.

You create this.

It's really that simple. You decide what you want and then you just go out and get it.

When I built my first 7-figure multi-million dollar business I did just this. I didn't just sit and do mantras, or create a vision board. I just got got off my ass and stepped into gear! I set goals and targets and then worked hard to achieve them. I knew I could do it. I had determination.

Babies who are learning to walk do the same thing. They don't do vision boards or mantras. They just get up, fall down and keep on trying until they do it. They too are determined.

So…

[box]”If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try again.” TWEET THIS[/box]

Money mantras and money affirmations

If you're not convinced then that's ok. As I said, money affirmations and money mantras can work and just like the method above using positive money affirmations it's pretty simple.

It takes 40 days to impress upon the subconscious ‘reacting' mind all that you desire and dream. It then becomes automatic behaviour in the conscious ‘acting' mind. Affirmations and mantras are just like doing any other form of repetitive exercise to change behaviour.

Here's the technique I use.

Have the money affirmations on your smart phone or iPhone. I do 5 and I go through them 10 times in one go. I then do them another 3 times at different points during the day. Often it's when I'm on the school run but it's up to you where you do them. The ideal place is somewhere you won't be distracted i.e. a quiet room in your house or when you're out walking, cycling etc. I live in the countryside so the roads are very quiet.

5 money affirmations

  • I always have more than enough money to meet my needs.
  • I attract money effortlessly and continually.
  • Money is good and keeps me safe.
  • I am open to receive the abundance of the universe.
  • I am worthy of living an abundant life.

Go through the money affirmations and say them out loud and slowly. Feel the money affirmations in your body as you're saying each one and if possible meditate on the money affirmation. As you're saying them imagine yourself for a moment enjoying the freedom to be and have whatever you wish. Feel the power of being able to choose anything you want and allow yourself to dream. Know that this can be your life. Now if you want to use the money affirmations correctly you have to get into that state where you feel like you can do anything.

If you get side-tracked or miss a day, then you'll have to go back to day 1 and start the money affirmations all over again.

A word of warming. Repeating the money affirmations 40 times daily for 40 days is not going to get you all the money you desire. It's not a spell or some mumbo jumbo woo-woo magic potion! The secret to attracting money using affirmations is about tapping into the emotional essence of success and abundance. To do this you need to be able to communicate with your inner emotional self.

Now I want to hear from you…

Tell me how you're creating wealth. Do money affirmations and mantras work for you? Or, do you just get on with things ? Share your wisdom here and let's help one another.

Thanks for participating!

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

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How to master time management

By | Mindset, Sales | One Comment

Time management

One of the most important lessons you can learn in life is how to manage your time. And, it's especially relevant if you’re an entrepreneur or on the cusp of becoming one because if you don't learn how to master time management your business won't get off the ground, let alone succeed.

Time is one of your most prized assets. Unlike money once you spend it, you can never get it back.

So, with 24 hours in your day, how can you manage your time better, become more productive, profitable and successful without working non-stop and sacrificing your personal life? And, whilst we're on this subject, how can you ensure that you've not just swapped a job for a job (now called your business) with a lower salary, fewer benefits, more hours and more risk?

Here's how.

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Couples in business: Should you do it?

By | Established business, Mindset, New business | 10 Comments

Mixing business with pleasure…

Family businesses and working wiht your husband or boyfriend should you do it by Jane FranklandUp above, you're in love…down below you're too slow! When it comes to the subject of couples in business and working with your boyfriend or husband I was clearly too slow, but that's for another post [dot, dot, dot].

They say for better or worse, for richer or poorer but no one ever mentions at the office AND at home, do they? Now whether you made those vows or not, I know the thought has crossed your mind…

So should you go into business or even work with your  boyfriend, or husband (aka your “beloved”) in an effort to gain financial freedom, and spend more time with your family?

Now before I give you my take on this, I want you to know that this has been a post I've been meaning to write for a long time. Those of you who know my story are probably thinking OMG what the ‘BLEEP' is she going to write!

Have no fear – I'm a pro!

You see, I've first hand experience of building a business and working with my (ex) beloved! I worked with him for just over 13 years and we owned a company together for 16 years.

I have to be honest – it's not a pretty story. There were both good and bad times. Owning a company and working together is not going to work out well for the vast majority of you. Very, very few can pull it off.

Sorry to burst your bubble!

The truth of the matter is few couples' relationships are strong enough to weather the storm. It's not an easy ride. So the question is….are you the exception to the rule?

Video break [I'm still being well behaved]

Disadvantages of couples in business

There's an old saying, “you shouldn't work with friends or family” and having done both, I can understand why! But, that's my story, so the question is, can you survive working together? Let's look at the challenges…

There's no real separation between work and home life

They say you need to set boundaries and have a clear separation between your work and personal life, but that's easier said than done. Take it from me, when you work and live together you never really switch off from work. There's always an opportunity to talk about it. Whether you're feeding the baby, out having dinner, on holiday or in bed making out!

I'm not joking…seriously! And, from a business perspective, it can actually be quite productive; there's a lot you can achieve!

Yep you heard me right!

However, from a personal relationship perspective it can be so damaging. For example, I remember several times returning home from the office, annoyed with my partner for not fulfilling something during the day. It was hard to look him in the eye, when he got home, with love. He'd let me down on a job and I was the one who had to answer to our client the next day. There was no getting away from it. I had two choices – 1) to bury it and let it fester or 2) to communicate my feelings and work to resolve it that night. This leads me naturally on to my next point.

You need to be very conscious of each others feelings

This point is particularly relevant when expressing criticism. Remember you're sharing your bed with this person and you don’t want to start a personal war. Effective communication is paramount if you're going to be successful in business together so get good at it and resolve any disagreements immediately. Harbouring ill thoughts will kill your relationship.

You need to find ways to keep your relationship alive

If you're working in close proximity it's very easy to get bored of one another no matter how much you care for each other. In my opinion, the only way to deal with this is to have an active life outside of work (independently) and a good social life. When you don't and your day consists of working on the business and then seeing to the kids, you end up being quite cut off from the world and living in a bubble.

You need to agree how to make decisions

You need to agree who's the boss and if your business operates on 50-50 share split, who's voice gets priority. If it's 50-50 split, you need to decide what will happen in a stale-mate situation. This is vital. In my company we both owned 100% of the shares and although there was an MD we decided that if we both couldn't agree on something, no action would be taken. Agreement was vital for the company to move forward.

You need to have legal agreements in place

No matter how much you trust one another, you need legal agreements in place. I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH. No one has a crystal ball and when money is involved some people view things in a very different way. They get greedy.

You need to make sure they're the most qualified for the job

This is a hard one as you're going to have to take out all the emotion and communicate this in a diplomatic way. One of the best things you can do is to agree this rule upfront. In my business, this is what we did. If someone was more capable of doing the job then they would be employed. Neither my partner nor I maintained our positions by default. We either had to step up, learn the skills and perform for the sake of the business, or we stepped aside and let another take our place. In some cases, there was never a question of us doing the job. It was clear from the offset that we didn't have the skills and didn't want them either.

Advantages of couples in business

You're more understanding of one another

Working together actually brings in a whole new level of understanding in a couple. You have a totally shared experience that brings you closer together. You're both on the same page. You understand why you're doing what you're doing. You're both working for the same end goal, pulling in the same direction and as a consequence you work with more understanding and gumption.

For example, I remember having to book my partner in for jobs over the weekend of Bank holidays, or even our children's birthdays. Had he come home and told me someone at work had done this I'd have been quite resentful, but because I'd done it (as we were growing our business) it was OK.

You've got more flexibility

Having built a business along with raising a family I can honestly say it's much easier when you can do this as a family unit. Again, you're both on the same page and you can always find ways to deal with child care or take time out to be at their school for an event. You can also have lunch breaks together or agree who's working late and with remote access and mobile communication anything is possible.

You'll achieve more and build a successful business

Napoleon Hill wrote about this in a chapter of his book Think and Grow Rich. It was all about sex transmutation. He said that love, romance, and sex are all emotions that are capable of driving men to heights of super achievement. Love is the emotion which serves as a safety valve, and insures balance, poise, and constructive effort. When combined, these three emotions may lift one to an altitude of a genius. All I can say is that I know what we achieved! [Wink, wink]

Now I want to hear from you!

Ever mixed business with your boyfriend or husband? Tell me whether you found it to be a good experience or not. Leave your story in the box below.

With love and gratitude – as always,

 

 

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